Monday, February 28, 2011

Top 10 Worst Jobs in the World

The next time you think your job sucks, think about these men and women who probably hate what they’re doing, but shrug things off, saying, “Well, it’s a living.” 

10. Sperm donor collector
Not counting crap, sperm is the grossest fluid our body excretes, especially if it’s not yours. I realized this job existed when I had to get a sperm count (doctor’s orders). The collector sits behind a closed window waiting for you to ring the buzzer and hand her the specimen in a cup. I’m sure she’s heard all kinds of requests like, “Can you give me a hand?” or “How about some lubrication?”

9. Drug smuggler
Drug dealing isn’t as glamorous as the movies would like to portray. Someone has to transport the goods, and guess where they have to hide it – in an orifice below your belt. This guy has to carry it in there for hours on the plane. It’s like being constipated but without the option of taking a dump, unless you want to go to jail.
X-ray: 67 packages of cocaines were found in drug smuggler's stomach

8. Paranormal researcher
It’s one thing to deal with complaining customers, but to confront poltergeists who want humans out of their house, that’s in a different realm. From practicing exorcisms to banishing demons, this job’s occupational hazards are bound to haunt you for a long time.
7. Telemarketers
Annoying people isn’t the best way to get them to buy anything from you. I know; I used to be one. I would phone people and ask them survey questions that would take 15 minutes. I had people scream at me telling me to get a real job. I lasted a week.
6. Nail factory inventory specialist 
Somebody has to figure out how many nails have been sold and how many nails are on stock. This guy has to nail it on the head or the company won’t know if pilferage is going on. And if one gets missing, he has to find it or he will get nailed.

5. Accountant for a tile company
If tiles weren’t boring enough, accounting for them only increases the flatness of this position. The only consolation is that he will always have a job because there will always be a need for tiles and accountants.

4. Food taster for VIPs
Each mouthful could be his last, so how can you ask the guy to savor all those delectable dishes that fans (and possibly enemies) send to his boss?

3. Blind masseuse
You work your hand to tough calluses expecting a sizeable tip, but how do you really know? Your client could be slipping you a P20 bill instead of the P500 you discussed before you unscrewed the bottle of massage oil.

2. Cameraman for a crocodile hunter
Ever watched those intrepid crocodile hunters and other insane survivalists who wrestle wild animals to get on TV? Sure, it’s alright to feel guiltless should those guys get killed in action; they volunteered for the job. But what about the rest of the crew? That’s why they stand back and use zoom lenses when the host explores those dark crevices that harbor snakes, scorpions, and other creatures who want us to leave them alone.

1. Septic tank cleaner
In developing countries like the Philippines, these warriors don’t wear special sanitary suits. With a groan and a prayer, they dive into the brown abyss to keep our toilets working. Remember that kid in “Slumdog Millionaire” who was so excited to see the Bollywood actor that he jumped into a cesspool? That’s what these guys do every week, but in the dark.

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